This is a little out of date - I wrote it a couple of weeks ago but
I've been moving house, so I never got round to posting it. It
completes a little cycle of blog entries, though, so I'm sticking it up
now.
Well, so much for that. It is with.. Well, with mixed feelings,
frankly, that I can announce the end of my career as a medical guinea
pig. It lasted a month, less two days.
On the one hand, I regret not
completing the course. I don't like to fail at things, and dropping out
of a three month course after one month feels like failure. It feels
like I let people down. I know how silly it is to feel that way, and I
know that even a negative result is still aa result, but... it's just
the way I'm wired, okay? I tried to stick with it as long as I could, I
tried to help... and I had to drop out.
On the other hand, I AM OFF THE
CRAPPY USELESS PILLS - WOOHOO! Thank crikey for that. Now,
hopefully, I can get back onto something proven which works.
This last month has been the crappiest of a series of crappy months
where I've had NO ENERGY and NO FUN. This has to be good timing,
given that I'm supposed to be moving house this week (well, moving from
one house-sitting to the next) and going away at the weekend too,
and I really didn't know how I was going to survive.
Let me just explain just how bad I've
been. I would have second thoughts about climbing a staircase two steps
at a time. This time last year, I was away surfing at the
weekend; this year, I don't think I'd be able to carry the board down
to the beach. This weekend, I managed to pack half a carload of boxes
and get them into storage - and that was me finished for the weekend,
completely wiped out. I had to rest up all that day and all the next,
just to recover. Now, hopefully, I can really start on the long road
back to some sort of sensible level of activity. It's been a long time.
Anyway - I am now moved into my new flat (more on that some other
time), and have been taking bog standard Prednisolone for three weeks -
and I feel wonderful. Last week, I managed to fit in a game of
five-a-side football in my lunch hour! That would have been totally
inconceivable three weeks ago. Glorious health!
9 comments:
so Matt, have you found anything on your own that relieves the symptoms at least partially?
Long baths?
and short showers.
Good to hear that you are now in your new flat. And that feeling wonderful thing? Yes, keep it up. :)
glad to hear the prednisone is working, but you can't stay on that long can you?
No. They put me on a tapering dose, so I'm gradually cutting down at the moment. What I generally find is I'm fine for long periods until I overstretch myself, or put undue stress on my body - like I did when I had my jaw broken, or with all the housemoving, etc. Then I get really tired and my digestive system starts boiling, and the whole thing kicks off. The great thing this time is I have all the house stuff done, and no stressful events on the horizon, so with a bit of luck I should be able to get a reasonable run of good health - and who knows, I might even be able to kick the thing entirely.
What I've noticed most of all is the damage to your self-confidence that chronic illness causes. Because you can't keep up with other people, it becomes harder to keep your social life going (turn down too many invitations and you don't get asked again), and then depression sets in, and because the illness is linked to that, it becomes a vicious, lonely spiral. I'm really hoping I can establish an upward spiral this time!
You can do it!
Stay out of the ocean for a while, until your immune system kicks in again. Look into Asacol, if ulcerative colitis is your chief complaint, as I've noticed a change in many sufferers in short order after they've started that treatment. Oh, and, have you had enough toilet humor for a while? Cheers.
It sounds like everything is moving in the right direction. I hope you continue to feel better. I know it is difficult to deal with depression and the impact it has on your life and circle of friends. I wish you a speedy recovery..
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