Presenting:
Government Joe Must Die
"Better than Dhalgren!" - Calum
"When I feel the urge to read a novel, I read this one" - Oscar Wilde
"I read this book, and satiated with emotion, I went to bed, and slept the sleep of the weary - and the saved." - Winston Churchill
Yes, I finished it. Half an hour ago, actually, so it's probably still full of spelling mistakes and all sorts (Word's spell checker crashed, which I thought was a rather rich bit of literary criticism coming from an application with a history of hanging out with giant animated paperclips).
Anyway, I need to walk away from it now for a bit, so I thought I'd post it now and let you all have a bit of fun. I'm pretty confident there aren't that many spelling mistakes in it. If there are any factual errors (moon sizes, Ring designations, etc.) then I couldn't care less, frankly - I wrote the thing in a MONTH, people. Get a grip. Likewise, if there are any gaping holes in the plot, then leave me at least a week to bask in the golden glow of my achievement before telling me, okay?
Brief summary: it's science fiction. It's set in the rings of Saturn. It's about a group of designers and architects who get caught up in... well, I'll let you find out for yourselves, shall I? It's heavily influenced by Bruce Sterling, and a book called 'Take Back Plenty' by Colin Greenland that made a big impression on me when I first read it, years ago.
I hope one or two of you will read it. I hope that same one or two of you enjoy it. Please give me lots of feedback of all sorts. The title is awful, I know, it's a working title, I couldn't think of anything better. The hero's name is Bernard, which I'm not at all sure about. Apart from that... well, see what you think...
And that's it, my contribution to NaNoWriMo: "NaNoWriMo is all about the magical power of deadlines. Give someone a goal and a goal-minded community and miracles are bound to happen. Pies will be eaten at amazing rates. Alfalfa will be harvested like never before. And novels will be written in a month." Big thanks to Calum for introducing me to the idea - I know you probably aren't checking your computer at the moment, buddy, but cheers. Hope you made it over that 50,000 word Finish line too.
22 comments:
The two quotes are great!
Well, thanks Murali, but that's hardly the point. Isn't anyone going to congratulate me? If only on achieving a completely gratuitous goal?
I've only just finished reading! Excellent 10k words... I particularly liked moist, rebuttal, slapdash, they're and brobdingnagian.
Darn it - I've only just started - and I'm s'posed to be working!
Anyway, congratulations arbitrary goal achiever!
I had a long conversation with someone about the inclusion of 'moist'. As a result, I can say with certainty that the word 'moist' is not used at any point.
Yes, how remiss of me, Congratulations Mooms! I was about to print it out when the printer window said 91 pages (!!!) As soon as I get a new reem of paper I'm there.
So proud of you! I've been through the gauntlet of NaNoWriMo (but not this year) and know what a challenge it is. Way to go!
I'll get to it. Congrats.
Thank you arbitrary goal achiever congratulators! Feel much better now.
Well done, there, sir, very well done! I will print it out when I get back to work (sticking it to The Man etc) and read it hopefully soon thereafter.
I managed 25000 words, before stalling badly. I know where it's to go, I know what words are going to be used but life (work and a very badly timed holiday) got in the way. Excuses. Still, I will finish it.
You know, having had two people say they'll print it out I now actually feel guilty over the waste of paper. Some author I'd be.
Moomie, never feel guilty over a work of your hands, nor of the printed word. My pearl of wisdom for the day. and further more, I compressed it into font size 10 and increased the margins, so I'm down to 60 pages. I'm printing now.
unless you've killed someone. feel guilty that is....
No people or animals were harmed during the making of this production.
(One keyboard was rather heavily battered, but as far as I know they don't have a lobbying group, so fcuk 'em.)
Hope you enjoy it, Debs. (hell, I hope you understand it, that'd be a good start)
My favorite newspaper had an article today on its last page (reprinted from New York Times). It was amusing to read it and half way through it I could relate well to this post of Matt. I liked this very much:
"In online forums and at get-togethers, NaNoWriMo participants complain, sometimes desperately, of plots that have ground to a halt, make no sense or have written themselves permanently into a corner. Characters have a way of boring their authors to tears, completely disappearing or, most perplexing of all, behaving in utterly unexpected ways."
I never did get round to frequenting the nanowrimo forums, or making it to the socials (of which I think there were a couple in Edinburgh). Maybe next time.
Thanks, Murali - I like that bit with the paragraph from 'Maybe Baby'. I know just exactly how she felt.
While I was thinking about the fine writing discussed here, I stumbled across a loose page of some work I did. Decided to post it for whatever reason, thinking to myself that, damn I've done a lot of writing but never challenged myself to do a freeform novel.
You did good, Matt. Maybe we'll see each other in the winner's circle some year.
Paul, your writing here tends to be long and esoteric. I always wondered what your professional training was. This looks like a fascinating piece. Can you publish the rest of it here?
My first delivery was a lot like this. The baby's heart rate dropped dramatically in each contraction. No one told me until it was all over, however.
NanoReview (from one of my workmates):
"This Christmas I was mostly reading "Government Joe Must Die" by moom.
If you haven't thought about wading through Matt's interesting descriptions of various obscure and less obscure moons of the Saturn system then you should give it a shot - it's not that bad for a month's work. It's not a pre-requisite that you enjoy Sci-Fi as most of the book is character dialogue anyway, but it might help.
The only real gripe I have about it is that the characters just aren't "real" enough - only one of them sounds like he's got the potential to be an alcoholic.
That's my Book-of-the-month recommendation over now thanks.
R."
Oh how nice for you! I must pick it up again, I slacked off because of holiday weariness, and reading puts me right to sleep.
Added another bookjacket quote - thanks Calum! Thanks for your positive comments, too. If it inspired you to continue writing, then that alone will have made it worth it. (And anyway, looking back, it doesn't seem like nearly such a big deal).
Picked this up again the other day. I was mortified - there are apostrophes in all the wrong places! And I thought my grammar was pretty good...
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